Yet another great idea...

Introducing the audienceometer.

An essential piece of equipment for the modern person (good for both genders). The audienceometer (AM) behaves very much like the studio audience in a sitcom, except it is tuned in to "real life". The next time you make a stupid mistake like saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, the AM goes ooooooohh, thereby alerting you to your folly and allowing you to immediately correct your blunder or social faux pas.

When you say something really cute and positive to someone, it goes aaaaaahh, allowing you to then immediately correct it (if it was actually your worst enemy), or point two fingers at the person and click as you shoot your "guns" signalling your knowledge of how cool and caring you are.

Particularly helpful is the laughter at times of even mild humour, which boosts your own self confidence and allows you to continue telling stupid jokes long after you should have stopped. By this time people should be laughing at you, further helping you to think that your high school career counsellor was right about Stand-up Comedian.

The AM has the objectivity of an American teenager (additional maturity upgrade sold separately), and it's keen sense of social decorum is only enhanced by the user drinking heavily.

The AM is the size of a jelly bean and fits discreetly into the user's ear. It is only audible to the user to ensure you are unable to hear conflicting signals from potential other user's AMs (these things will soon be EVERYWHERE!)

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Batteries sold separately, no liability is accepted for AMs incorrect judgement. "Helping you be successful with other Emotional Failures" and the AM logo are copyright of the Consumer Crap Corporation.